The Mind is the battlefield. John’s Side

Think Back…..

• How does Satan attempt to defeat us? With Strategy and deceit through well laid plans and deliberate deception.
• What did Jesus call the devil? Father of Lies and of all that is false.
• Explain the phrase, “One of the devil’s strong points in patience.”  He is willing to invest time to defeat us.
• What are strongholds? How can we overcome them? are what we are held in bondage due to a certain way of thinking. We can overcome them by knowing the Word of God.
• Why are prayer and praise effective weapons in overcoming strongholds? Praise and prayer both involve the Word. We praise God according to His Word and His goodness. 

via The Mind is the battlefield. Mary’s Side « Extraordinary Jeni.

John’s Side

John also has his own set of problems.  Instead of taking his position as head of the family he lets his wife run everything. He feels defeated so he will retreat into TV and sports. John is hiding from his responsibility because he hates confrontation. He prefers to take a passive attitude.

Ephesians 5:25

 ²⁵ Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

John needs to take responsibility, and with responsibility comes authority. He should be firm with his wife — loving, but firm. He should reassure Mary that even though she was hurt as a child, as she releases herself to God through trusting HIM, she will gain confidence that not all men are like her father was. 

John should be doing a lot of things, but like Mary, he also has “mindsets” that open the door for the devil to hold him captive. He was very abused in childhood. His domineering mother had a sharp tongue and frequently said hurtful things to him. Since he craved her approval he tried hard, but the harder he tried the more mistakes he made. At school being rejected my friends would just be an everyday child event, but because John already felt rejected by his mother it was devastating. John simply had no courage to be anything but quiet, shy and withdrawn.

What is the Answer.

Luke 4:18-19

   ¹⁸ “The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me  to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free, ¹⁹ to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.”

With John and Mary’s conflicting problems, it is not too hard to imagine what their home life is like. Strife is not warfare, but needs to be dealt with it because the devil loves it!  If they continue to study God’s Word, the will know the truth, and acting on the truth will set them free. But they must each face the truth about themselves and their past as God reveals it to them. It is a painful process to face our faults and deal with them.

Our past may explain why we’re suffering, BUT we must not use it as an excuse to stay in bondage. 

The Way Out

1 Corinthians 10:13

¹³ No temptation^[a] has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted^[b] beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted,^[c] he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.

We have seen through Mary & John that Satan takes our circumstance and builds strongholds in our lives, but thank God we have the weapons to tear them down. God doesnt abandon us and leave us helpless. God will not allow us to be tempted beyond what we can bear, but with every temptation He will also provide the way out, the escape.

God is on your side.

Questions

• Read Luke 4:18, 19. What has God promised concerning the poor, the captives, the blind, the oppressed and others?
• Read 1 Corinthians 10:13. What does this verse say about God and the temptations and trials we encounter while tearing down stronghold?
• If you are a Mary of a John; you probably realize you have these inner strongholds….can you look in your past and pinpoint were the originated?

Chapter 15: The FOO Fandango

Creating Healthy Boundaries with Your Extended Families.

Susie talked about how everyone loves ballroom dancing, she thinks an even more alluring dance is a dance performed by married couples. She relates this dance to being played out in the context off extended family relationships. I thought to myself…what??

Author Martha Beck identified as the FOO (Family Of Origin) Fandango. The FOO Fandango is determined by how a person’s family of origin has impacted his or her life and continues to impact his or her current non-FOO personal relationships.

We need to understand our FOO history because it affects how we operate in our current family setting. The fact is that much of our current behavior has been influenced by an early childhood desire to fit in. As children, we attempted to fall into step with our family around us, which in essence created a behavior dance that we brought into our adult lives.

Chapter 13: Money Mayhem

Section Four

Friendly Fire

In marriage we often experience a type of friendly fire they very things that are there to bless a marriage can sometimes tear it apart. Things like the kids. Or a house. Or money. And even extended family. Those blessings in life can become warped, and instead of supporting the marriage, they attack it. They are positioned in a place that drains the marriage instead of replenishing it.

This section will uncover the ways that the “friendlies” in our life erroneously fire on our marriage.

Chapter 2 Fight Right

Fight Right
 How to fight fair with your husband even when you disagree.

Susie tells in this chapter of how she loves to sit on the porch in the early morning to watch the sun rise and drink her coffee.. how wonderful a time … except for one problem… mosquitoes…. She sprays and hits, but refuses to give in her relaxing morning for this annoyance.  Can you think of something you really love to do, if that one annoyance was not there it would be perfect bliss!? Arguments are to relationships what bugs are to the outdoors. The two don’t exist without each other. If you go outside, expect bugs. If you love someone, expect some conflict.

If you have been married awhile its likely you’ve had your share of fights with your man; and you know those “hot topics” that will rev a fight up! Most of us share a few, money (lack of and who gets it), sex, kids, and work.  After a fight gone wrong do we ever feel good about it? Do you feel accomplished or just confused on why you had to fight in the first place? My fights are usually so dumb.. why couldn’t I just let that one go ? I say to myself a lot, I let so much go.. how long do I have to get “used” stomped on, whatever makes me feel better about being very ungodly.. The truth is we are going to fight and have disagreements, we are different people and in my case completely different people!
We need to learn how to fight in a way that honors God and our spouse. Although I feel I am ALWAYS giving in. I need to be the “better” person. I need to lead with my willingness to shine God grace for my unsaved husband. How will he ever come to God if I a Godly woman am acting for far from where I should be?