The Exploder Who Shames Herself.

Those days where you are so close to the edge of being unglued the littlest things can nudge you over. All the trying to stay calm is just adding to the tension. That’s what makes raw emotions so complicated. They come from out of nowhere. In any situation when these raw emotions will ether move outward or inward; but we can do better.

We can all describe those days where everything just goes wrong, you are late, everyone is rude, and you’d rather just go back to bed and re-do. You are worn thin with your time, energy, and patience. When this happens we are often on the verge of becoming unglued if not already.  Before we become unglued on our husband, children, co-workers, or friends we can stop and see the downside of this reaction.

Sip the shame so you won’t have to guzzle the regret. -Lysa

By stopping and “sipping” or seeing what this blow up will cause can save us from having to be filled with regret. We do not want to explode on others, but we also do not want to stuff.  Remember the balance between the two is soul-intergrity where our honesty is godly.

Finding my soul Integrity in God’s Perspective

We have to start by looking back at Ephesians 6:12.

12 For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.

The person you are mad or annoyed at is not the enemy here. In God’s economy people don’t stand on opposing sides of the conflict scale, People stand on one side and Satan stands on the other.

When we dump hurt into one anthers lives we aren’t leveling the conflict scale. We are elevating Satan’s side of the scale. Satan loves when we do his work for hi by dumping on each other. Instead of letting loose on this flesh and blood annoying person, use this opportunity to shame Satan back to hell. Give grace when they do not deserve it using the power of Chris!

After explaining that Satan is our real enemy, reminding us to put on our spiritual armor each day, and reiterating the absolute necessity of prayer. Paul says one more thing.

19 Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlesslymake known the mystery of the gospel, – Ephesians 6:19

This verse is in the exact place it needed to be. After we remember Satan is the enemy instead of the person in front of us we must carefully consider the words we speak to this person. Some Christians will pull scriptures out to suit their needs but not God’s. We need to find a non-emotional, clearheaded moment to think of what to say.

Crafting My Response Template

Lysa came up with a template to deal with these potential unglued moments.

1. Begin by honoring the one offended.   We won’t feel the other person deserves it and they don’t! BUT we don’t deserve God’s grace and we get it daily. Honor them as a person…. a person God loves.  Honor their good qualities.
2. Keep your responses short and full of grace. The wordier we get, the greater risk we will slip into defensiveness.  If something needs to be clarified, keep it concise and wrapped in grace.  A line to acknowledge the expressed hurt. A line to clarify the intentions. A line of gentle honesty about the issue. If an apology is appropriate a line for that. A line asking for grace.
3. End by extending compassion. Chances are this person is hurting for reasons that have nothing to do with this situation.  If it is possible to end on a sincere way do so. They could use the love, but nothing fake or forced.

Don’t every harsh word needs an email or response. Ask God before you do so.  Even in face to face issues remember this: honor them, keep it short and wrapped with grace, Extend some kind of compassion.

There is a big difference between a reaction and a reply. Reactions are typically harsh words used to prove how wrong the other person is. A gentle reply turns away wrath.

Choosing a gentle reply doesn’t mean you’re weak; it actually means you possess a rare and godly strength. 

 

The Prisoners

Chapter 3. UNGLUED.

This chapter begins telling you about Lysa’s friend who had to go to prison and the labels that would leave on that friends life.

Labels

Labels are awful. They imprison us in categories that are hard to escape.  We may not have an inmate number label but we still label ourselves. Labels only stick if we let them.

Those labels start out as little threads of self-dissatisfaction but ultimately weave together into a straightjacket of self-condemnation.

Some prisons don’t require bars to keep people locked inside. All it takes is their perception that they belong there. How many times have you told yourself you will always be late, be unorganized, or negative? We know we have issues and we commonly label ourselves, but there has to be another way.

The Unfinished Sculpture

David… the sculpture by Michelangelo; Lysa went to see this masterpiece only to find he wasn’t the first one to start the sculpture. Many had tried for years to complete this project and could not. 25 years later Michelangelo took up the challenge. He never left the marble; he slept beside it for more than two years. After the David was finished he quoted…

I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free……. It is easy. You just chip away the stone that doesn’t look like David.

When Lysa went to see the David she was drawn to the previous tries that they called The Prisoners. These statues were all of us… unfinished works of art locked away in a hard place. She looked at the finished nearly perfect product and spoke to God.

Oh God, chisel me. I don’t want to be locked in my hard places forever.

It is beautiful when our Master chisels. God doesn’t allow the unglued moments of our lives to happen so we’ll label  ourselves and stay stuck. He allows the unglued moments to make us aware of the chiseling that needs to be done. Let God Chisel.

Refuse Labels of the Past

The Living Stone and a Chosen People

4 As you come to him, the living Stone—rejected by humans but chosen by God and precious to him— 5 you also, like living stones, are being built into a spiritual house[a] to be a holy priesthood, offering spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ.

9 But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession,that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.

Remember Peter from my last post FREEDOM FOR THE UNGLUED; Peter’s name was changed to match who he would be.  Jesus saw past his shifty ways to the courageous man who needed chiseling.  Jesus saw Peter not as he was but as he could be. Later in Acts, we can see evidence of the chiseled Peter. He’s bold, assured, prepared to do the work the Master created him to do.  (Acts 2:14, 40-41)

The new chiseled Peter led three thousand people to the Lord in one day!

Call it grace

Are you ready to see yourself as God’s workmanship and do the work you’ve been called to do?

1. Identify the lane as a lie meant to tear you down.
2. Chose to view this circumstance as a call to action, not a call to beat myself up.
3. Use the momentum of tackling one label to help you tackle more.

Grace. You will see it. You will feel it. You will call it grace.

Lysa’s friend made the choice that put her in prison, but it was God who freed her in the midst of that place. She was used and freed from bondage she didn’t even know she had.

The Three Percent Difference

Most food come with 3% of poison in them. I have heard that there is allowed that certain percent of rat dropping, bugs, and just plain nasty stuff in our food. This poison in the food brings the rats in to snack on something yummy and they die!

Couldn’t this be how our virtue is stolen?  Our integrity compromised? Our hearts hardened? Our spirits desensitized to the things of the Lord? Lured in by something seemingly harmless; but poisoned.  Like in those movies we have all seen about the wife slowly poisoning her abusive husband each night slowly killing him….. it takes awhile, sneaks up on you..

We may be dying this slow death.. 3% at a time.

If this is something the enemy is doing with you? What has he cleverly used to seduce you into a web woven too tightly for you to escape? Undetected until you suddenly realize the terminal effect its having on you? Even the ones you love.

Pick your poison

Some may have drug problems, alcohol, eating, porn, cheating, any sin can be your poison from having a relationship with God. Even that quick preview of a show that has a raucous sexual scene, even if you do change the channel in time, that is etched in your mind and anyone else who saw it… including your children.. I know we can’t keep our children from being exposed to things they shouldn’t, but I will do my part to not add that poison myself. We do not want these moments to be weaknesses, or become strongholds in our lives.

We are God’s people and we have been made holy through His deliberate act  of grace, and we bear the responsibility to protect the tender hearts and minds of those we dearly love.

3% is where it starts

I will probably get some flack from people on this, BUT this 3% makes me think of smoking marijuana. Many people (i know a lot) say ohhhhh it’s just for fun, its grown from the ground, God made this, it’s almost legal anyways…….. This makes me so mad!! This 3% they are talking about it defiantly smoking weed!! You think no big deal, but then it doesn’t get you high enough so you move up to bigger and “better” stuff; just to feel the way you first felt when you smoked it. The gateway has been opened and is very hard to close with drug use.

So, if you are going to be like Paul and cast out all evil. (Ephesians 5:3) we need to make this serious! Go above just making a promise with yourself and God, go farther to tell everyone you care about that you are changing your life. We need accountability. In a culture saturated with opportunities to be swayed in opposition to purity, the woman resolved to integrity must be girded about with other sisters who are walking with her, holding her accountable to a holy standard.

From experience I say those people who would temp you, will most likely not force what they do upon you and probably applaud your changing in life; but some may mock you and think you are being dramatic with your “bible thumping ways.” I will THUMP MY BIBLE all the way to heaven! sound the drums call on the trumpets I am a child of God! If I am not judging, or being prideful there should be no problem with this. In most cases these people will distance themselves from you because they likely feel condemnation for their sins. This will open up places for new friendships in your life; healthy ones.

We need these friends who don’t make us feel embarrassed for being spiritually sensitive, who provide a place where our resolution to live pure before Him is never under pressure, never a point of ridicule, never ganged up against. That willingness to support one another helps us remain strong in our promises. It doesn’t take a lot of poison to take you down. Surround yourself with the cure… His people.

Is there any area of your life that you’d be embarrassed or ashamed for others to find out about?

Resolution to live with the highest standard of virtue and purity

Structural Soundness * 3% Difference * From Strength to Strength

 

Newness of Life

John Bevere “Extraordinary”

John 1:16

¹⁶ Out of his fullness we have all received grace in place of grace already given.

Grace is God’s unmerited gift that not only saved us from eternal damnation, but also gave us His characteristics. For out of His fullness we have all received one grace after another and spiritual blessing upon spiritual blessing and even favor upon favor and gift upon gift.  For while the law was given through Moses, grace and truth came through Jesus Christ.

How you see yourself  greatly shapes and influences what you believe and how you act. God wants you to see yourself through His eyes, not your own or anyone else’s. Look at the below scripture, think again who you are in Him.

Galatians 4:4-7

Easy-to-Read Version (ERV)

⁴ But when the right time came, God sent his Son, who was born from a woman and lived under the law. ⁵ God did this so that he could buy the freedom of those who were under the law. God’s purpose was to make us his children. ⁶ Since you are now God’s children, he has sent the Spirit of his Son into your hearts. The Spirit cries out, “ Abba, ^[a]Father.” ⁷ Now you are not slaves like before. You are God’s children, and you will receive everything he promised his children.

How great our God is to not only save us, but to bring us into his family. Just as we could give food to the hungry, but would we bring that stranger into our home and give them a place to stay invite them into your family! That is a scary thought to me.

Grace is not Permission to Sin

Because grace has not been taught clearly many Christians today view it as the Big Cover Up. Using grace for an excuse to do things you know are sin.  2 Corinthians 6:1 calls this God’s grace in vain. Have you done this? Well I am covered by His grace so I can do this little sin because I am not doing this BIG sin….. sin is sin people!! Hard to grasp with the horrible things we see in this world; but sin in sin.

God obviously knew we would not be able to always follow the law; the ten commandments. Galatians 3:19-25 talks more about these laws. God did not come to get rid of the law, He came to fulfill them.

Matthew 5:17-18

Easy-to-Read Version (ERV)

Jesus and the Old Testament Writings

 ¹⁷ “Don’t think that I have come to destroy the Law of Moses or the teaching of the prophets. I have come not to destroy their teachings but to give full meaning to them. ¹⁸ I assure you that nothing will disappear from the law until heaven and earth are gone. The law will not lose even the smallest letter or the smallest part of a letter until it has all been done.

Grace does not give us the excuse to break the laws here on Earth! These people who go on a killing spree obviously do not hear from God because His first commandment is thou shall not KILL!!! Our God never lies and there is no exceptions to the rules He put in place. When we have this grace we are held to a higher standard than those who do not know His heart.

From the video series.

Scripture                 *  Life under the law    *  under grace

Matthew 5:21-24  *  Do not murder           *  Cannot be angry with your brother. No offering until it is handled.

Matthew 5:27-28  * Do not commit adultery  *  Cannot look at a woman lustful

Matthew 5:31-21   * Divorce permitted with a certificate *  You divorce you become an adulteress

Matthew 5:33-37  *  Do not swear falsely; faithfully fulfill your vows.  *  Do not swear at all

Matthew 5:38-42  *  Revenge permitted; an eye for an eye   *  Do not resist to give to an evil. Who ever asks you give.

Matthew 5:43-47  *  Love your neighbor and hate your enemies  * Pray for those who persecute you.

Ezekiel 11:19-20

New International Version (NIV)

¹⁹ I will give them an undivided heart and put a new spirit in them; I will remove from them their heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh. ²⁰ Then they will follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws. They will be my people, and I will be their God.

We do not do these things to get His favor, we do these things to give Him pleasure. He has already given His son for our hearts, now is the time to show Him we were worth it!!

John 1 in Detail

30 Day Breakthrough Day 1

John 1

The Word Became Flesh

 ¹ In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. ² He was with God in the beginning. ³ Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. ⁴ In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. ⁵ The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome (or understood) it.

Wondering if John wrote this book… was he talking in third person when he was speaking about himself? I am guessing so. Why was he restating Genesis? – Thanks to Pastor Brad I know that a John did write this book, but this John 1 in talking about John the Baptist…… so confusing huh?! 

John’s opening echoes Genesis (Gen 1:1), but whereas Genesis refers to the God’s activity at the beginning of creation, here we learn of a being who existed before creation took place. In the beginning the Word already was. So we actually start before the beginning, outside of time and space in eternity. If we want to understand who Jesus is, John says, we must begin with the relationship shared between the Father and the Son “before the world began” (Jn 17:5, 24). – biblegateway. John does not reflect philosophically on the Holy Trinity but bears witness to it as the eternal reality, leaving it to later teachers to try to expound its bright mystery.

Just as we are already known to God before we are born the Word was already in place before the beginning of time, because the Word is God and God is the Word.  Having John state that EVERYTHING was created by God, made it to be known that nothing was an exception.

Jesus’ life, manifest in the incarnation, is our light (Jn 1:4).  In order to have life we need to know God, and Jesus is our source of such knowledge. As our light, his life is our guide. He is our wisdom, that which reveals all else to us and enables us to see. Jesus himself is the presence of God’s own life and light and that he makes this life and light available to human beings.

⁶ There was a man sent from God whose name was John. ⁷ He came as a witness to testify concerning that light, so that through him all might believe. ⁸ He himself was not the light; he came only as a witness to the light.

 ⁹ The true light that gives light to everyone was coming into the world. ¹⁰ He was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognize him. ¹¹ He came to that which was his own, but his own did not receive him. ¹² Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God— ¹³children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband’s will, but born of God.

I love how it is written that John did not come trying to be the light for people, but a witness to the light! I always say to myself be the light and the people around me will follow; but I need to be a witness to the light. I need to shine God’s glory not my own.

“The light of Jesus is as universal as the light of creation. He did not come merely to some Gnostic elite, nor did he come to a single nation or culture. This light is the Word that became flesh in a given time and place. ” His light shines on everyone as does the sun He created!! We have to choose to receive that light.

“John does not say “he made them children of God” but “he gave them power to become children of God” It is Christ’s blood and the Father’s will that produce children of God not their Earthly parents or our bloodline. This Spiritual life is not forced on the believer but must be received.

¹⁵ (John testified concerning him. He cried out, saying, “This is the one I spoke about when I said, ‘He who comes after me has surpassed me because he was before me.’”) ¹⁶ Out of his fullness we have all received grace in place of grace already given. ¹⁷ For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ. ¹⁸ No one has ever seen God, but the one and only Son, who is himself God and^[b] is in closest relationship with the Father, has made him known.

This Word, the agent of creation, has become a creature. He who brought the universe into existence now is born within the universe as a human being. This thought is so familiar in Christianity we may no longer be staggered by it, but for those non-Christians this is the last straw on the crazy train. It is beyond theirs (and ours) to comprehend this concept. Then throw the Holy Spirit in the mix and wow we are confused. One God, three things at once?! I have had someone ask me about that before early on in my faith. “How can God be God, Jesus, and The Holy Spirit all at once…?” I had no clue ether, I just knew if the bible said it; it was true.

V. 14 talks about glory; glory is more than an image of honor, it is used to refer to God’s revealed character. John presents Jesus as the fulfillment of Judaism But this replacement comes through fulfillment, not rejection. Replacement does not mean there is no longer any role for the Old Testament, but it does mean any attempt to know God that is not centered in Jesus is defective, since in him is the fullness.

John’s Disciples Follow Jesus

 ³⁵ The next day John was there again with two of his disciples. ³⁶ When he saw Jesus passing by, he said, “Look, the Lamb of God!” ³⁷ When the two disciples heard him say this, they followed Jesus. ³⁸ Turning around, Jesus saw them following and asked, “What do you want?” They said, “Rabbi” (which means “Teacher”), “where are you staying?”³⁹ “Come,” he replied, “and you will see.” So they went and saw where he was staying, and they spent that day with him. It was about four in the afternoon.

 ⁴⁰ Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother, was one of the two who heard what John had said and who had followed Jesus. ⁴¹ The first thing Andrew did was to find his brother Simon and tell him, “We have found the Messiah” (that is, the Christ). ⁴² And he brought him to Jesus. Jesus looked at him and said, “You are Simon son of John. You will be called Cephas”(which, when translated, is Peter^[g]).

Jesus Calls Philip and Nathanael

 ⁴³ The next day Jesus decided to leave for Galilee. Finding Philip, he said to him, “Follow me.” ⁴⁴ Philip, like Andrew and Peter, was from the town of Bethsaida. ⁴⁵ Philip found Nathanael and told him, “We have found the one Moses wrote about in the Law, and about whom the prophets also wrote—Jesus of Nazareth, the son of Joseph.”

 ⁴⁶ “Nazareth! Can anything good come from there?” Nathanael asked. “Come and see,” said Philip.⁴⁷ When Jesus saw Nathanael approaching, he said of him, “Here truly is an Israelite in whom there is no deceit.” ⁴⁸ “How do you know me?” Nathanael asked. Jesus answered, “I saw you while you were still under the fig tree before Philip called you.”

 ⁴⁹ Then Nathanael declared, “Rabbi, you are the Son of God; you are the king of Israel.” ⁵⁰ Jesus said, “You believe^[h] because I told you I saw you under the fig tree. You will see greater things than that.” ⁵¹ He then added, “Very truly I tell you,^[i] you^[j] will see ‘heaven open, and the angels of God ascending and descending on’^[k] the Son of Man.”

John, the Baptist is a witness to Jesus and a model of true discipleship. He saw Jesus and they followed Him!! What if they picked the wrong man?? Because John had such a relationship with God he knew that he knew. The followed Jesus and He turned around saying what do you want?!?! Oh my! That would be scary I think. This is the man everyone has been waiting to save them and they get that reply. After they asked where are you staying, He only says Follow Me. That is so like God to give no info; just follow me.

Everyone spread the word and gathered around Jesus and start to question His identity. Could this be the Messiah they had be waiting for? Jesus is truly King, but his kingdom is not of this world (Jn 18:36). He is indeed the Son of God, but in a sense far beyond anything expected by Moses and the prophets. Each of Jesus’ titles affirmed in this chapter is true, so the disciples have glimpsed something of Jesus’ identity.

We can never entirely understand the power of God, we just need to know that we know; He is our creator, Jesus saved us, the Holy SPirit guides us and all we need all of this to even see a glimpse of what, and who God is!

Chapter 16: Happy Anniversary

Making Marriage Last For a Lifetime

The truth is; we are all a mess! We know we are nowhere near deserving of all that God has gifted us with – be it His Son, Jesus Christ, who died on behalf of our sins, or our husband, who loves us in and through the marriage commitment he made to us years ago.  God and our husbands’ love us through all our mess!

We need to take a closer look into God’s idea of Love… specifically unconditional love. Because being married means you have someone who loves you no matter how weird or wonderful you are 0 it’s about your husband being there, come what may. Unconditional love has given us the opportunity to be wholly real and wholly loved.

God intends for us to love. It’s the unselfish love mentioned in

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

This is the kind of love that never gives up!! The kind of love that breeds hope – the hope it takes for any married couple to weather the years with a commitment that “endures through every circumstance.”